The Wonderful Child
It is quite fulfilling to be a wonderful child. It is also exciting to be associated with such a child especially as a parent or a teacher. As the child becomes a successful adult, even the employer and the government and its officials would take delight in the person’s accomplishments. Success certainly attracts friends and in some cases, enemies depending on one’s environment and how one manages the success.
Time and chance have their places in everyone’s life. It is therefore possible for a child to become wonderful even in the most difficult of circumstances. The evidence available, however, indicates that some environments produce more wonderful children than others. We can therefore choose to deliberately create such an environment instead of leaving the child’s future to chance. Doing our best and leaving the rest in the hands of God rather than doing nothing and hoping that luck will smile on us tends to guarantee the best result possible. The objective of this article is to underscore the fact that faith without work is dead and get all stakeholders to do their utmost to help raise more wonderful children for this serves everyone’s interests well.
As we try to help the child, we should be conscious of the fact that the child arrives the earth with a brain that has no knowledge and values. Psychologists would say that such a brain is tabula rasa. The child however, arrives with some inherited capacities from the parents which even the best of environments cannot change. Example is height. The child of very intelligent parents is also programmed to be intelligent but whether this manifests to everyone’s advantage would depend on the type of nurture the child receives. In other words, the quality of environment the child grows up in is a major determinant of what the child eventually becomes. Needless to emphasize that the wonderful child has a balanced personality and rates high not only in academics but also physically, socially, emotionally, and spiritually. Such a child is a constructive thinker and acts responsibly. The wonderful child is not only conscious of her/his rights but also recognizes and respects the rights of others. The following dimensions of the environment should be considered critical if the objective is to produce such a child:
The Family- This is perhaps, the most critical of all the variables influencing the child’s development. Parents set the tone here and serve as role models. What the child sees them do is what the child considers acceptable whether it is ultimately destructive or not. Here, actions are louder than words. Do not preach what you do not practice for the child won’t ‘hear’ it. Children will read if their parents read. They will respect the opposite sex if they see mutual respect. Parents who use intemperate language should expect to have children who are intemperate in their expressions. An unstable home where conflict is served for breakfast, lunch, and dinner is certainly not the environment that produces the wonderful child.
The Community- We all belong to communities and are influenced by our neighbourhoods. What children see in their neighbourhoods is interpreted by them to be the way to live. Strong family values may mitigate the problems that the larger society can generate for the child but may not prevent all. Parents who live in abusive, conflict-laden and unprogressive environments should seek the means to relocate to a more success-friendly environment.
The School System-This is of great influence especially while the child is under ten. Schools should be selected not just because their pupils excel in academics but also because they help to equip the child with social skills and provide a networking platform in an atmosphere that emphasizes how vulnerable we can become without God’s support.
The Media- We are in the age where cable television and the internet have become major influencers of the mind. Don’t accept it when any one tells you that the media cannot influence a child who is well brought up. The evidence available says even adults have serious difficulty resisting suggestions from the media. Monitor and control what the child watches if you want him/her to be great.
Religious Organizations- They help to build the child spiritually and show how we can interpret the mysteries of life. Not all of them are doing a good job. Many of them in Africa present God as a Father-Christmas who can give you all things and tolerate your recklessness provided you give him money. Keep children away from such environments and take them to places where the concept of grace is interpreted to mean that salvation is not paid for but running a good race would require us to play our parts in society well and adequately.
Peer Group- As children approach teenage years, parents should know that the opinions of their peers would become very weighty and difficult to ignore. Don’t embarrass them before their peers. Create a relationship that enables them to talk about their friends and bring them home. This way, you can influence them diplomatically and help not only your child to become wonderful but also contribute to the well-being of the larger society by helping to bring up other children well. This way, we all become winners. The issues raised here have been expanded in the author's two digital books available at Amazon. They are Right Thinking Right Actions and Success Mindset.
Peter Ogudoro is a Professional Counsellor, educationist, and development consultant who trained at the Graduate Institute of International Development and Applied Economics. You may wish to run an intensive programme that will equip you with the essential skills for parenting and relationship management so that you can realize all your dreams regarding your child/children and spouse. The information provided at http://www.fasteducation.org.uk/scholarship will be of tremendous help. It is an investment worth making for the dividends are enormous. To learn of Peter Ogudoro's full profile, visit www.fasteducation.org.uk/administrators-profile. He can be reached via telephone no. +2348023249654.